July 6, 2011

Setback...

Ugh! Well, today was week four, day one of the Couch to 5K program. I'm afraid I psyched myself out hours before we even began the run.

I was not excited to start with, then (shockingly) I felt fine--great even--after the first 3-minute jog. I was kind of proud of myself! Then we got into the 5-minute jog, and again I was feeling fine. Again I was shocked. Then IT happened. I found myself staring at a big, daunting hill, and I yelled ahead to Greg, "How much longer?" (Mistake.) He slowed down to say, "I don't know, a minute or two maybe." As he slowed down, I heard Easton crying as I continued to stare at that mean hill.

Hearing him cry and knowing we had about half the run left before heading home upset me, and that coupled with the scary hill and thinking we could have two minutes left (which turned out to be untrue) made me start to tear up. I was about to CRY on a running trail. With people walking, running and biking by! THAT made me embarrassed and even more upset so I could hardly breathe. Long story short, I walked up that hill.

Slowing down to walk made me feel like a failure. Dramatic, I know. I barely made it through the second 3-minute run, and I pretty much walked the rest of the way. I got the energy up to run about 2 minutes during the second 5-minute run, but overall I just felt defeated. Honestly, I'm still beating myself up about it.

The silver lining? I'm already determined to get right back out there Friday, and I REFUSE to psyche myself out. After feeling so good in the beginning, I know I can do it!

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